"Busy" is a 4 Letter Word {thoughts on life and entrepreneurship}

I used to love the word Busy. It peppered my vocabulary in my twenties and then in my thirties, my life was all about the word Busy. Busy perfectly captured what I valued- productivity. I defined my productivity (aka self-worth) by how busy I was and how much I could get Done. Long live the "to-do" list!

I saw all the Busy people around me and thought, yes! I belong to the Busy world of Doing Stuff! Yay me! It was a great feeling. Knowing I was Busy and could always say I was Busy. When asked about my job, life, kids, the answer was always Busy!

And then I hit my head. I am not being funny about this. My head was struck by the door frame of my Volvo on October 29th, 2012. I was in a car accident that smashed my car sideways. I hit my head on a Monday morning going to my Busy job where I did Busy things and paid for my Busy life.

What happened over the next few years was depressing, frustrating, sad, and life-altering. But all that chaos was about something bigger. Transformation. Change. Enlightenment.

I have always been a spiritual person. But hitting my head prompted a shift in my life. I was literally forced to do one thing at a time. I was forced to look at faces and try to remember people, things, memories, what my child said five minutes ago. I was forced to really look at a clock and think about time, or just decide that it didn't matter as much. I was forced to think about what I did every day as a vocation, as a mother. I was forced to not be Busy.

Being Not Busy made me crazy for a while. I wasn't very good at accepting it. I didn't want to change. I wanted to be the same. I was smart and ambitious and I wanted my brain to be the same. But it wasn't and it never would be. Medical professionals told me to accept the new way of thinking, the new ways of remembering, or not remembering at all. It took a long time for me to accept that change was inevitable. I could either go with the flow, or stay stuck. I have children and they are the reason I turned a corner.

I could write for days on what I have learned since being Busy. It is hard to find words to replace busy when that is what people want to hear. How is your business? Thriving. Challenging. Rewarding. I love it. It is easier to say Busy. But it wasn't just about perspective (we are ALL busy, no one person is busier than another, on this entire planet).

It was time to stop being Busy every day. To take time. To breathe. To listen. To Be Present.

I studied yoga for years. I have meditated for years. I have taught being present for years. It is easier said than done, right? It was time for me to practice being present.  And more importantly, be happy about it.

I stopped creating a life of Busy. My work schedule, our family life, our commitments, are all about more time and space. My kids are not over-scheduled. They have free time. They have family time.

I embraced living in the moment. I feel like a walk. Let's go. I feel like cookies. Let's bake. I feel like music. Let's dance.

I started to work with a flow. I have a list of what needs to be done. I have deadlines. But I also allow myself to work from one thing to another based on how I presently feel and what I need. I need to stand. Time to cook. I need to creative. Time to journal. I need to organize. Time to sit with my planner. I spend less and less time on screens. This has been the best change (and also why my blog posts are less frequent).

I no longer embrace Busy. I no longer see it as a badge of success. I do not strive to be a busy super mom. Instead, I embrace the natural rhythm of life. I listen to my body and go along with the ebb and flow of my children. I make space in my life for life to happen, and for the times when things don't go as planned. I pay attention.

The benefits of not being busy have been tremendous. I get more work done. I am a more present and patient parent. I have more time for the people and activities that I love. I posted to Instagram a while back, "the less I do, the more I get done." And it is so true. I have more time for myself (not yet enough but I am getting better at this), and I am a softer, more joyful person.

A few years ago I had an image for what I wanted our home life to be. It went something like this: a home filled with joy, music, laughter. A home of beautiful and useful things, and not too many things. A home that sheltered us, and where we could grow our own food, where I could do my life's work, where my children could have the space and comfort to be carefree and nurtured.

It took some time. It took a lot of change. But I think we are actually here.



  1. Beautiful post and such a great reminder! So glad to hear that so much good has come since your accident.


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